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Last-Ditch Climate Change Report Provides Locations Of Weapons, Current Whereabouts Of Oil Executives

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Last-Ditch Climate Change Report Provides Locations Of Weapons, Current Whereabouts Of Oil Executives
NEW YORK—In a desperate, perhaps final attempt to prevent the earth’s temperatures from rising to catastrophic levels, a last-ditch climate change report issued Tuesday by the U.N. includes nothing more than the whereabouts of top oil executives and directions to secret weapons caches. “For decades, we have failed in our efforts to spur action by describing in rigorous scientific detail the ways in which global warming will cause widespread misery for billions of innocent people, and so this time we have taken a different approach,” read the report, a 500-page directory that simply lists the names and addresses of key...
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